Saturday, June 23, 2007

The Press is Rubbing Salt into the Wounds

It seems that the liberal press has its reasons for focusing so much on Paris Hilton's sorrows and rubbing salt into her wounds. Every time something good happens in Iraq, they pull out poor Paris's mugshot!

It turns out that the press completely ignored the fact that our surge has been totally successful at reaching its goal number of soldiers in Iraq.

Also, the press chose not to report that our soldiers will come home as early as next year, if the Iraqi troops are ready to handle the situation then.

Perhaps the saddest example is that a soldier's wife actually sent soil from the good old US of A to her hubbie in Iraq, along with some grass seed so he could have a chance to walk on "American soil." Well, he got that grass growing and he trims it with scissors. But you wouldn't know that from the liberal press. That young couple did all that work for no recognition.

The press is too busy showing Paris's mugshot and pointing out that her tax cut is bigger than yours. Give me a break. Honor the troops. Don't dishonor Paris Hilton.

Friday, June 15, 2007

Pardon Scooter Libby

I don't see what all the fuss is about. A liberal judge with an agenda puts an outstanding public servant (assistant to the undeniably best vice president) behind bars just because he could not remember details of when (or if) he revealed the identity of a CIA operative to a newspaper reporter.

If she were such a good secret agent, why couldn't she keep her secret?

President Bush, it's time to get out your pardon pen!

Saturday, June 09, 2007

Keep the Jails Available for The Real Criminals

Ever since I spent that drizzly morning trying to get on camera outside of the windows of the Today Show on a trip to New York about a year ago, I have been enchanted. She drove by in a SUV Limosine and there was no mistaking her smooth skin, long neck, and Coulteresque hair. It was Paris Hilton, heir to the fortune of the great American entrepeneur, philanthropist, and capitalist Conrad Hilton.

I felt like I was seeing royalty. Let me tell you, that car was the cleanest car I have ever seen!

That very same day, a little bit later, a waitress who was crying, clumsily, spilled a glass of water on my fries and did not say she was sorry when she replaced them. She said something in a foreign language--Puerto Rican or Mexican, maybe.

I think the moral of my story is clear: Let's keep the room in the prisons for the people who are really breaking the law, the illegal immigrants.

Friday, June 01, 2007

Meet Me at the Beach

I am heading out to the beach with my harpoon in hand. I hear that those two hunchback whales just got tired of having a gay old time in old Frisco and are coming this way. Maybe I can get some of my Jap friends to help me aim the harpoon. Sushi anyone?!

LoL.