Send Bush Cards

Our commander and chief needs us. He feels all alone, now that the Democrats staged a coup and the Republicans are pretending not to know him. The president needs cards from regular people like you and upper class people like me so he won't feel like we don't appreciate what he is doing. Send your cards to

comments@whitehouse.gov.

President George Bush
The White House
1600 Pennsylvania Avenue NW
Washington, DC
20500

What Went Wrong!?

Everyone is asking what went wrong with the elections. I will tell you. Hugo Chavez, the friend of of Fidel Castro and president of Venezuela, hacked into the voting machines in the good old US of A and manipulated the results! Democracy? RIP. This is terrible because now President Bush feels nervous and insecure cause he thinks he has lost support. From the people I have been talking to, I get the idea that he really got the majority of the vote--the Republicans anyway.

Election Day, USA!!!

It is election day in the United States and I spent most of the day talking to voters outside of various neighborhood polling places. They tell me that it doesn't matter who you vote for, the important thing is that you educate yourself and vote for the most qualified candidate.

I couldn't disagree more. We have to send a strong message around the world that we support President Bush. If we act all fragmented now, the terrorists may blow up the super bowl!

Don't get me wrong, I am not saying that President Bush is less qualified than anyone. After all, he is not running. And did you hear what John Kerry said about the troops all being retarded? It's enough to make me want to break one of the ten commandments.

Anyway, I am not worried. We have the voting machines. They will do what's right. LOL!